My Purpose Driven Life. I Think.

Life is a bit everywhere for me right now, I mean I just spent my evening battling for space on my reading table with one middle-aged grasshopper, 2 agile beetles and another creature of doubtful origin. (Be aware that none of these are code names or euphemisms, I’m talking of real life creepy crawlies *insert disgusted shudder here*). My school is in the middle of the rain forest…well not really… but it seems like that, what with its plethora of vile creatures whose whereabouts the Discovery Channel would dearly love to know. On my way to get dinner I was chased by two mature frogs and back at my residence, I had to cleverly by-pass a temperamental rat to get to my room. A better ‘WhichKindlife?!?’ scenario, I am yet to find. Every day in this school is an extended F.M.L moment, particularly for this woman who hates all things that breathe but aren’t human…I mean, I hate some humans too but that’s really neither here nor there at the moment

I digress.

I saw this statement recently and it had a domino effect on my thoughts; “ God grant me Serenity to accept the things I can not change. Courage to accept the things I can and Wisdom to know the difference”. Its part of a longer prayer by Reinold Niebuhr if Wikipedia is to be believed;

"God, grant us the...
Serenity to accept things we cannot change,
Courage to change the things we can, and the
Wisdom to know the difference
Patience for the things that take time
Appreciation for all that we have, and
Tolerance for those with different struggles
Freedom to live beyond the limitations of our past ways, the
Ability to feel your love for us and our love for each other and the
Strength to get up and try again even when we feel it is hopeless."

Recently my life has started getting more purpose, a clearer focus and dare I say it, substantial progress (big shout out to God for Hisawesomeamazingmarvellouswondefulness to me and mine). I’m excited about the changes and looking forward to the future but the truth is clarity and acceleration bring big responsibilities. All of a sudden, the need for self-evaluation arises because in order to focus on your focus, you need really clear vision. This automatically means you have to weed your life, prune your life’s leaves, take out those tiny buds of disorder and the stronger, longer-existing, soul entangling roots… cut off the distractions. This is never easy but;

-I’m learning that I need to harness my resources, streamline my abilities and center on myself, my aspirations, my hopes, to fully ‘focus on my focus’. Having scattered thoughts, a million and one plans and so on is a recipe for disaster at this stage, I’m realising.

-I’m learning that Good Distractions exist! Some distractions are useful and in fact, beneficial BUT partaking in them at the wrong time can be detrimental to my vision.

-I’m learning that if I don’t do X or Y, I will not die despite how I feel at the moment of deprivation. Disciplining the self is the hardest thing but ‘Mens Agitat Molem’…’The Mind Moves Matter’. Mind over matter. I’ve always said humans are mutants…with superhero-style strength available usually at necessary moments.

-I’m learning to understand my purpose for being. It is not at 18 that a meeting is called in heaven with King Jesus, chubby Cherubim and seranading Seraphim in attendance, with the rest of the heavenly hosts (including the crying doves I suspect heaven is full of), conglomerating to decide on your purpose in life. You are actually born with a purpose and already equipped at birth with the relevant tools to respond to your purpose. So you see why it will be a shame if you go through life without discovering and living in your purpose? You will always feel unfulfilled. I really believe your purpose is living that life that satisfies you, personally. I don’t believe everyone is destined to be wealthy (I strongly believe I am though *ahem*) but I really believe everyone is destined to be happy. If you don’t find your calling, you will always have that nagging feeling of unfulfilment and more likely than not be unhappy no matter how wealthy you are. IMO.

-Finally, I am happy with myself. And that matters more than almost anything to me.